Veggisode 42

The War Of The Roses

The Vegetable Stalker in Brazil! Stay tuned to this Veggie News Network station to find out more.

Hello, Victoria Apple reporting for VNN., Veggie News Network. Veggie Head Stalker, AKA: the Vegetable Stalker, appears to be back up to his old tricks. Reports from South America indicate that Veggie Head Stalker and North American Poet Laureate, Billy Jones attacked a commercial grower of roses located just outside of the capital city of Brazil. Afterwards, we managed to catch up with Mr. Jones who had this to say,

“Veggie rode his stallion true,
an’ me, I rode ol’ Jack
prepared to meet the battle
knowing we could not turn back.
We rode to fight the roses
knowing they were armed with thorns,
but of what we were about to face
we had not been warned.


We rode to taste the rose hips
waiting there for he and me
and gather their young buds
to make a fragrant tea.
But when we rode up to them
their buds all warned, “Go way!”
but Veggie said, “Your time has come.
We’re eating you today.”


Was Veggie led the fated charge
with me to follow on,
but no sooner than it started,
ol’ Veggie, he was gone!
The roses had ganged up on him.
Thickets pulled him from his steed,
leaving me to fear his death
at the hand of rose’s deeds.


But just then, Jack, he turned about
to run right through the bush
trampling roses to the ground
where they had once been lush.
Was then I spied ol’ Veggie
a hangin’ to Jack’s tail,
saying, “Man, I’m glad you came along
to save me for a spell.”

What’s this? Has our meek lowly scribe suddenly become a warrior? Could it be the Rebel Poet has finally taken-up Veggie’s cause? So there’s two of them now, that can’t be good. What if they become a crime fighting duo like Batman and Robin, Starsky and Hutch, Otis Grumbler and Smog Boy, or Abbot and Costello? What’s that? You say Abbot and Costello were comedians, not crime fighters. I’m sorry, I just read what’s on the cards.

Stay tuned to this VNN station or go to our website at VegetableStalker.com.

Dumber Than A Box Of Rocks

Or, Should Politicians Be Required To Take IQ Tests?

It's true, RecycleBill has no life but at least I've got a blog and for that I guess I should be grateful 'cause some people don't even have that. And so we begin another recap of the week's events with a bit of commentary thrown in. Our most read posts for the past 7 days were:

Green Driveway Construction because the answer is over your head.
A Sure Fire Way To Bring Google To Greensboro Too bad nobody in Greensboro has a clue.
Florida Senator Bill Nelson Replies To RecycleBill and I don't even live in Florida.
Slow Rider, Green Money Transfer when it absolutely, positively doesn't need to get there over night.
Sell Your Beer Can Tabs For Big Bucks!!! proves how dumb the human race has become.

The search engine querys most used to access our site were, "junkacar.com scam" , "stupidest design" (nobody participated so maybe next year I'll put up some prize money.) "where to sell can tabs" and "recycle rubber bands."

The community who made the most use of our local recyclers search engine was non other than Wilmington, North Carolina. My thanks for helping to make North Carolina clean and green.

And finally, the websites and blogs who sent the most readers our way were... the usual suspects. Our thanks go out to all of you.

Traveling The Green Time Machine

Or, The Only Green Clock Is A Sundial?

Maybe, just maybe this wouldn't be of any concern if all the green gadgets were really green, For example:

Solar cells must face the light in order to charge batteries and when you consider where most watches spend most of their time I find it hard to believe the new Casio Pathfinder is green in anything beyond its green colored plastic parts made from fossil fuels. And the fact that the "green time machine" will be shipped from half way around the world won't add to its green creds.

The making of solar cells requires vast amounts of energy and natural resources and while I'm not against solar cells or solar power, adding a solar cell to dirty technology doesn't green that technology and is too often a waste of the resources required to manufacture, market and ship the product itself. We can't afford to waste solar energy any more than we can afford to waste other forms of energy.

For more info on green gadgets and the stupid designers who dream them up you only need remember, "No mount of technology can overcome stupidity." -- Billy Jones.

About That Google Fiber Bar Ross And Shoe Are Promoting

Or, FYI?

The Google Fiber Bar is powered by Wibiya.com and earns its keep via Adsense advertising placed in the search results and by marketing the info they glean from users. Wibiya is owned by Modular Patterns Ltd., an Israeli startup company founded in 2008 which is backed by Dr. Yossi Vardi.

As to any possible revenue Ross and TheShu happen to earn from the installation of the Fiber Bar I really can't say.

The Fiber Bar makes public your websites' stats through Whois.Amung.us. The page you see displayed belongs to Ed Cone. I would have thought Ed's traffic was higher.

The Fiber Bar slows the loading time for any website on which it is installed to the point that those persons with slow Internet connections cannot view the sites on which it is installed. I have to leave home and go to the office to read Ed's blog now that he has installed the Fiber Bar.

But for RecycleBill, the most disconcerting thing about the Fiber Bar is the additional bandwidth it requires to function. You see, bandwidth requires energy and the production of energy depletes the Earth's natural resources and increases our dependence on foreign oil.

Without a doubt the lower energy needs of fiber optics would help green Greensboro's information technologies but if you're serious about bringing fiber optics to Greensboro. Well, you know how links work.

Tapped Or Tapped Out?

Or, Water, Water Everywhere?

RecycleBill doesn't plan to get caught without enough to meet my needs.